How to Host Friendsgiving: An Easy Checklist
Updated: 4 days ago
Friendsgiving is Thanksgiving with fewer rules. Friends instead of family, a potluck instead of one cook, and a table that can be a little looser. It is also easy to overthink. You do not need matching plates, a formal centerpiece or a long menu. You need a plan, a few good serving pieces and friends who are happy to bring a dish. This is the checklist I would hand to a friend hosting for the first time: what to plan, what to buy, and when to do each thing.
Everything on the table below, from the insulated casserole carrier to the gold star place card holders, is linked in my Friendsgiving LTK post. For the dressier version of the same holiday, see A Beautiful Thanksgiving Table.
How do you host Friendsgiving?
To host Friendsgiving, make the main dish and the drinks yourself, and ask each guest to bring one side or dessert. Then set a simple table, keep the timeline loose and let people help.
That is the whole idea. The host's job is the frame: the date, the space, the main dish and the table. Guests fill it in.
The five decisions to make first:
The date. Many groups pick a weekend near Thanksgiving so people can still travel to family for the holiday itself.
The guest count. Count your chairs and your plates before you send invitations.
The main dish. A turkey, a turkey breast, a ham or a big pasta bake. Choose what your oven can handle.
The format. Potluck, partial potluck, or you cook and they bring drinks.
The start time. An afternoon start, around 3 or 4, gives everyone a long, unhurried meal.
Once these are set, everything else on this checklist is easy.
Send the invitation by text or a simple group message. Include the date, the time, the address and a link to the shared potluck list, so nobody needs to ask twice. If anyone has a food allergy or a dietary preference, ask them to note it on the list. It saves a quiet scramble on the day.
What is the easiest Friendsgiving menu?
The easiest Friendsgiving menu is one main dish from the host and a potluck for the rest. Use a shared list so you end up with a balance of sides, salads and desserts, not five pies.
A simple sign-up list for ten to twelve people:
Host: the main dish, gravy, rolls and drinks.
Two guests: a potato dish, mashed or roasted.
Two guests: a green vegetable or a salad.
One guest: stuffing or a grain dish.
One guest: cranberry sauce and a cheese board.
Two guests: dessert, at least one of them pie.
Everyone else: wine, cider, ice or flowers.
Ask guests to bring their dish ready to serve, in the dish it will be served from. An insulated casserole carrier keeps a hot dish hot in the car and makes the hand-off at the door easy.
Keep the host's part of the menu small on purpose. One main dish, a gravy and good bread are enough to anchor the table. If you love to cook, add one side you make every year. If you do not, buy a pie from a good bakery and put it on the dessert stand. Nobody will mind.
If someone asks what to bring and the list is full, point them to a small gift for the house instead. My best hostess gifts under $50 are a good place to start.
What do you need to host Friendsgiving?
You need enough seats, plates, glasses and serving pieces for everyone, plus a way to keep food warm and a simple table setting. Most of it can be borrowed, but a few pieces are worth having.
The checklist from my LTK post:
Insulated casserole carrier, for bringing dishes to and from the party.
Green ceramic gravy boat, because gravy in a saucepan never looks right on the table.
Turkey platter, large enough to carve on and serve from.
Ceramic pie dishes, for baking and serving in the same dish.
Beaded tiered dessert stand, so desserts take up height instead of table space.
Stemless wine glasses, which are steadier on a crowded table.
Plaid table runner, the easiest way to make a long table feel finished.
"Happy Friendsgiving" cocktail napkins, for drinks and appetizers.
Velvet mini pumpkins, for the center of the table.
Gold star place card holders, if you want to seat people on purpose.
Also check: serving spoons for every potluck dish, extension cords for slow cookers, extra ice, trash bags and containers for leftovers.
How do you set a Friendsgiving table on a budget?
Start with a runner, add a line of small pumpkins and candles down the center, and finish with place cards. Those three layers make a table look planned without matching dinnerware.
Step by step:
Lay the runner. A plaid runner hides a table that is two tables pushed together.
Build the center line. Alternate velvet mini pumpkins with short candles. Keep everything low so people can see each other.
Mix the plates. Mismatched plates look intentional when the napkins match.
Fold the napkins simply. A plain rectangle on the plate is enough.
Add place cards. Gold star holders and a handwritten name make every seat feel considered.
Keep serving dishes on a side table or kitchen island, buffet style, so the table stays clear.
For a fuller, candlelit version in ivory, brass and amber, see A Beautiful Thanksgiving Table. The same ideas scale down for a smaller apartment.
Light matters as much as the table. Turn off the overhead light, use lamps and candles, and the room feels warmer right away. Unscented candles are best near food, so the scent does not compete with the meal.
When should you start planning Friendsgiving?
Start about two weeks before. That is enough time to send invitations, fill the potluck list and order anything you need, without the planning taking over your month.
A simple timeline:
Two weeks before: set the date and time, send invitations and share the potluck list.
One week before: count chairs, plates, glasses and serving pieces. Order what is missing.
Four or five days before: if you are cooking a frozen turkey, check the thawing time on the package and move it to the refrigerator.
Two days before: shop for the main dish, drinks and ice. Confirm the potluck list.
The day before: set the table, chill the drinks and clear space in the refrigerator.
The morning of: cook the main dish, put out serving spoons and set up a drinks station.
One hour before: light candles, start music and put out a small appetizer.
After dinner, send everyone home with leftovers in containers you will not need back.
Keep the timeline and the potluck names on a card on the refrigerator. On the day, it is easier to glance at a list than to remember everything. Ask one friend to handle drinks and one to handle music, and say yes when someone offers to help.
What should guests bring to Friendsgiving?
Guests should bring the dish they signed up for, ready to serve, plus a serving spoon. A small gift for the host is a kind extra, but not expected.
If you are a guest, three habits make you the friend who gets invited back:
Arrive with your dish hot or cold, not half-cooked.
Label your dish if it has nuts, dairy or gluten.
Offer to wash up before you leave.
If you are not sure what to bring, ask the host. A simple "what would help most?" is always welcome. The answer might be ice, folding chairs or an extra serving spoon.
For the host gift, a candle, a set of napkins or a small tray all work. My hostess gift guide has 24 ideas, and the hostess gifts under $50 edit narrows it down to ten.
Frequently asked questions
When is Friendsgiving?
Friendsgiving has no fixed date. Many groups hold it on a weekend before or after Thanksgiving so it does not clash with family plans.
Should the host make the turkey?
Usually, yes. The host makes the main dish because it needs the oven for hours, and guests bring the sides and desserts.
How many people should you invite to Friendsgiving?
Invite as many people as you can seat comfortably. Count chairs first. Eight to twelve is a manageable size for a first-time host.
How do you keep food warm at Friendsgiving?
Use insulated casserole carriers for dishes coming from other kitchens, a low oven for anything that needs reheating, and slow cookers for mashed potatoes or gravy.
What comes after Friendsgiving?
December. When you are ready, see the best coffee-table books to give this Christmas, Christmas activities for kids with printables from Tiger Eleven Studio, and stocking stuffers she'll actually use.
Shop the edit: everything on this checklist is linked in my Friendsgiving LTK post, and all of my picks are on my LTK page.
Shop the Post
#ad · This post contains affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
Comments